Modern Believer T-Shirts

The ten ammendments

"I have an app for that."

"I have sent you all an e-mail of today's text if you wish to follow along."

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

"If I can't ask for more wishes, how about more genies?"

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

A woman drawing birds makes them fly around the room.

'Good work pulling the sword from the stone. Now, how 'bout loosening the lid on the magic pickle jar?'

I want a calendar where every day says here and now

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

'Gee you're lucky! I don't think the Tooth-Fairy will ever bring me anything...'

Fairy Vet

Next Sunday - Rap Mass! 'I thought we reached the limit when we had that jazz mass.'

'I don't believe in hoarding cash and gold Dad: I invest in shares online...'

Guru levitates while wife vacuums.

"Holy water, holy water...."

"Well I don't know how they fly when I can't!"

'Fish and bread? That's it? Seriously?'

"Boy, the sooner she realises the only authority I obey is the Bible, the better!"

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

'Your life will being when all of your kids are married and the dog dies.'

". . . and don't forget to like and subscribe to my channel. Amen."

Pastor wearing sunglasses against the hymns.

"I don't want to sound desperate, but either you transform me with a kiss or I end up dissected in a ninth-grade science lab."

"I think it's time you ditched the phoney crown and admitted to yourself that princess or no princess, you'll always be a frog."

'Hurry! There's not a moment to lose.'

'I've got the inside track ... But the Devil uses the big freeway.'

Define gravity! - Next Exit.

'It's a medical miracle. According to your notes you should have been dead years ago!'

"Your recovery has defied all known science...so let's just keep this between ourselves!"

"Tia Carmen, can you make Sylvia Sanchez, the prettiest girl in school, look me in the eye and ask about my feelings."

"You don't have to worry about using up your minutes."

TV and man