Modern Dating Experiences Mugs

'I'm afraid we don't have any gentlemen on hand right now -- how about a good old boy?'

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

Mobile phones and long distance relationships,

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

"I thought you did a great job with your gender neutral statements ... There will be a second date."

"This isn't working. We have nothing in common."

'Crabs, sharks, octopi...'

'Let's do lunch.'

"I've become so good at dating—relationships that used to take months now last a matter of days."

'She won't even look at me. It's like I'm a banner ad.'

"I must say, Doctor Jeckyll, that you bear little resemblance to your profile picture."

"Don't you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do."

"I love you very much, but apparently it's break-up season."

"Our marriage has been renewed for another season."

"I'm so shallow."

"If you think you've earned this by consistently retweeting my tweets -- you're right."

'Your credit card or mine?'

"Sorry I'm late... I was getting our date approved by my lawyer."

"I broke it off with him when I realized his love of quinoa was but a sham."

'No, I don't remember asking you to move in with me. Not only that, I don't remember who you are!'

"It's another letter from Mr. Wentworth. He writes, 'You up?' and then there are some pictures of a smiley face and an eggplant."

'I'd invite you in, but I've given up jackasses for Lent.'

'Would it be too forward of me to give you a tweet?'

"We need to text about our relationship."

"I googled you and I'm not interested."

"He's in his late somethings, but he's cute."

"I've lost touch with my roots, so I'm flying to Omaha but I'll be back Monday."

"Mom and dad's marriage wasn't made in heaven. They met online, so it was made in the Cloud."

"This one's different, mummy, he wants me for my brain."