Mocking Master T-Shirts

"I could see finding him a cool guy if I wasn't married to him."

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

So you're a mocking bird...

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

'I didn't tell you to 'be quite Frank'. I said,'be quiet, Frank'!'

"I love a woman with a sense of humour."

"...Any more of that fowl language and you're barred!"

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

"Fellow graduates, when I look at you, I see future princesses, ninjas, wizards, superheroes, and zombies."

Custard pie ejects from book - 'How to be a clown'

'She must be good at mixing cement - She's been making rock cakes for years.'

"Apparently Wilbur hasn't gotten that raise. He's still hamming it up for the boss."

"Good luck, Sanders. We're sure going to miss that little imitation you do of me at office parties."

(Singing) 'Doctor, what's wrong with me?' 'Staff in-fec-tion.'

'Always the wise guy.'

"'Ere, mate - you look like a right muppett..!"

'His dad was a standup. He's a quip off the old block.'

"He's surprisingly sensitive about heckling."

Toilet Humour: 'Did you hear about the constipated human?'

Dog Dreams

"I see you like to let your actions do the talking."

Al, trust me� You're ready for tomorrow's comic strip. I really want to nail my performance, Axel. "Waiter, there's a fly in my soup�waiter, there's a fly in my soup�waiter, there's a fly in my soup�waiter, there's a fly in my soup�waiter�"

A Dummy Corporation.

'Ok, ok, what about this one? There was an Irishman, an Italian and an Englishman ..'

"You'll like my mate - he's a scream..!"

Are you making airplane noises?

'When you discovered your bark was worse than your bite, you decided to see me?'

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"Look! I can imitate you!"

'I can't keep a secret, either!'

Canoe Carriers