Mock Trial Enthusiast T-Shirts

'It's all very well trainees learning in a classroom setting...'

First we sue the guy who saved your life. We'll file a no-class-action suit.

So you'd like to be a lawyer...we require honest, genuine people, who are prepared to...learn how to fake sincerity.

Trial by Media

'I really crammed last night.'

"You can't plead cute."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"Apparently Wilbur hasn't gotten that raise. He's still hamming it up for the boss."

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."

"I object, Your Honor! This line of questioning is really weird."

Counsel's Opinion.

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

'I believe my trainee is putting together the trial bundle for you now.'

"Not guilty by virtue of reasonable doubt."

"One soft drink and eleven stiff drinks."

'Your honor, we are appealing on grounds the post-trial book deals didn't match the pre-trial publicity.'

Disorder in the Court!

Closing arguments.

"It's clear from the replay that it was a leading question."

'Where was I on the night of the 7th of August? I was home washing my hair.'

Murder trials at the criminal court shown as a theatrical show

'Your honor, the defense would like to buy a vowel!'

'Your Honor, we find the defendant to be the subject of misplaced guilt.'

'It hasn't been a complete failure - we've learned volumes about falling.'

Innocent bystanders are real tough to convict: 'You saw it happen, why didn't you do anything?'

Judge has work boxes labeled Sustained and Overruled.

'Are you capable of distinguishing right from wrong?', 'Can you give me a hint?'

'Is it a crime that I ate my yung? They're the best damn Chinese food in town!'

"Well, the president of the ethics committee is in jail and his deputy is binge drinking with three prostitutes. Do you want to leave a message?"

''Not guilty,' eh? - Color me suspicious!'

Lawyers offices, with todays score card. - Won...Lost ...Tied

'It's so cool we have another test today.'