Miscommunication Magician T-Shirts

No, it says, "Help, I have laryngitis and my wallet is stuck in my pocket."

'I said 'barium,' not 'bury him'!'

Staff. Manager. So then you must say "I refuse to lift weights." Hey, that's not what I expected when I hired you to be a resistance training instructor!

"I meant the dog!"

"When you promised me 'a set of wheels', I assumed a company car."

"So tell me, Wallace. Has someone gobbled up my Viagra again?" "No. Wait. I thought they were delicious candy mints!"

Communication Breakdowns

"Here's another fine mess you've gotten us into."

'Thanks to his brilliant conversation techniques, Bob had the shortest calls.'

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

"Ding dong means the witch is dead. Ding ding means dinner is ready."

'I meant bring your fishing tackle.'

After years of chasing and fighting they discovered it was all just a misunderstanding.

"For the last time, 'port' is left, 'starboard' is right!"

Jude completely misunderstands his doctor's request for a stool sample.

"Excuse me, but it's GREG, Greg Chalmers."

'She's throwing a dinner party - Just for me...'

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

"This is not what I meant when I said 'let's chill'."

When you said it was a place with women and a bar I didn't think you meant a ballet class.

"OK, you're right. It does say take 2 tablets by mouth."

"When you said you were taking me south on vacation I assumed you meant to the tropics."

"Aunt Mary, I think you may not have heard me right. I requested a bundt cake."

'I'm afraid you've got the wrong department.'

"No, what I said was we need more stakeholders."

"No...I said aperitif!!"

"What makes you think you can patronize me?"

'Sir, I'm an estate agent. Not a showbiz agent.'

Shoot...not literally, of course.

'Chapman, you misunderstood what I said about the Clark account. I said mull it over.'

"Just wanted to make sure you said no mayo that way I'll know to give you extra."

Sea kelp? I said "seek help"!

The Embarrassment of Van Gogh

"You said you wanted an Easter-related present."

'I gave you permission to Skype my class, not skip it.'