Mind Investigator Gifts

'Third one this month. Do you always have to analyze everything to death?'

In the future, human thought will enter an age of clarity and purity never before dreamed of.

The Map of the human brain

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

Sigmund Freud.

X-ray Psychology.

* For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

Unguided imagery

Noreldo, The Mental Marvel, Reads The Mind Of His Cat, Ned:

"Don't even think about it."

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

'I see you in five years from now, you're still coming to see me. Do you want me to book the appointments in advance?'

Roland, the schizophrenic cowboy.

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

"I should warn you that many of John's thoughts are subliminal."

"Have you tried just giving your head a shake?"

'I beleive I have a new approach to psychotherapy, but, like everything else, the FDA tells me it first has to be tested on mice.'

'Enlightenment-shmenlightenment - what I'm worried about is tenure!'

'What do lawyers really want, Mr. Montague?'

A Padlock and a Pet Key.

"Don't step on the blacks or the nasty bogie man will get you!"

Psychologist is SHOCKED by what his elderly patent is telling him.

"Oh, it's you, I'm glad I picked up.You wouldn't believe how many annoying telepathicmarketing calls I get."

"I had that dream again where you're writing down all my fears and anxieties and working them into a screenplay."

"My System 1 tells me she's articulate, capable, shrewd. My System 2 says BIMBO."

"You'll never be a full participant in your mental health care if you keep saying wacky things."

'There is nothing physically wrong. It needs a psychiatrist.'

Lost and Profound.

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

'You get into arguments even when you talk to yourself ?'

Confirmation Bias

"'Cogito, ergo sum' is all very well for you, but what about me?"

'Relax, it's purely a seasonally affected disorder.'

Jacques Lacan