Millennium Mavens Pillows

'It's a way to make money.'

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

"A Bill of Rights? - Don't you TRUST me?"

"I didn't really start applying myself seriously until around the eighth life."

Medieval headlines.

'Even in the mundane tasks, aim for perfection!'

'Isn't that the ghastly couple we met last summer in Rock?'

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

"Wife and two hernias to support!"

'I can't remember. Edith, am I forgetful?'

'The part of your brain you used to diagnose what is wrong with you is what is wrong with you.'

"It needs some work, but it does have good bones."

'Boat thefts are up, so I invested in a bigger padlock.'

'Someday, I'm sure there will be a smaller, more mobile version.'

"Good lord, Agnes, the dreaded millennium bug has struck!"

"Oh my God, I HAVE to touch your hair!"

Mechanization of sugar cane harvesting

'If my phone is a smart phone, is your wall phone a dumb phone?'

'Would you mind throwing out some of your spare motorcycle parts? I'd like to park my car in the garage.'

A semi-automated coconut harvester.

'Surviving the workout is nothing compared to surviving the support group.'

Gym'll Fix it

Hairstyle Inspiration

"Really looks like they could use a miracle about now sir!"

"The new motivational posters have been unpopular, yet effective."

Psychic powers!

'Terrible pile-up. One of the Zimmer frames jack-knifed...'

"I thought you measured the distance to the ground. I hope Bob's okay."

"No offense taken. I don't remember you either."

"I'm camping out here until the new phone comes out."