Militia T-Shirts

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Sir Winston Churchill

Neo-International Law

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

Servicemen.

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

Cat in a tank...

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

'This one's for marrying him, and this one's for raising the kids.'

Military Medals

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

"War is hell and so is this soup."

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

"I know we just met, but all I got is a twenty-four-hour pass!"

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

Scene of seagull troops about to charge a picnic.

'I was in a camouflage unit, so this one is for Hide and Seek.'

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

Trump

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."