Microwave Meal Maestro Pillows

Woman watching cookery show on TV while cooking a microwave meal.

Three square meals a day.

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

Burnt or Raw?

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

'What'll it be?'

"Nobody truly appreciates the magic that goes into a good omelet."

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

"I'm unable to process this image."

'We're not at home, Stu. You can't just order 'I don't care'.'

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

'How do you like your steaks? Scorched, burnt or cremated?'

A butcher and his apprentice.

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

'This 'homework,' was it done today?'

"I got into the coffee for the wordplay."

"Mum, why can't we just have a normal Sunday roast like other families?"

"Oh -- I've got one! If you could have dinner with anyone from history, living or dead, who would you have cater it?"

Tonight, on the microwave channel... chicken pot pie!

'Why do my parents have to be professional chefs?!'

'You followed the recipie but it's missing the secret ingredient: Mom.'

A family gets ready for their microwave meal on the patio.

'Wow- you're one helluva great cook! Even the stuff you ordered from the delivery store is burned!'

"I don't like it."

'. . . the Winter of Discontent Soup, Arab Spring Roll, Summer Madness Salad and The Season of Mellow Mists Fruit Medley.'

'I dunno. Maybe we need a new slogan.'

"Compliments to the chef. It really is superbly cooked!"

'Whatever diet they're on, tell them what they ordered is perfect for them.'

"Do you have a menu sorted by relevance, average customer review, and price low to high?"

'There's a lamb chop in my soup.' - 'Oh, that's where it got to. It belongs to table six.'

"I'd prefer this to a gold watch any day."