Microbe Fitness Enthusiasts T-Shirts

Bacteria doing their anaerobic exercises.

"I'm going to get you fired."

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

'I'm afraid it's one of those new superbugs.'

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

'I don't believe it - if this evidence is correct it'll rock the very foundations of our research grant application.'

Centers for Disease Control. Staff Picks. Jean. Rob. Carly. Ed. Sonia. Kim.

"Ever killed a man?"

Asexual harassment.

'Walking your pet amoeba again, Henry?'

Friendly bacteria

"I feel so seen right now."

Louis Pasteur

'The anaerobic ones are just sitting there, but the aerobic bacteria are doing jumping jacks, sit-up, leg lifts....'

'This is quite a thrill. I've never been on electron microscope before.'

Gym. Try our Boot Camp Classes. I was dishonorably discharged!

Just what is it that amoebas really want.

Being the gentleman he was, Brian insisted on paying in restaurants even though he suddenly realised that dating a bacterium was going to be more expensive than he first thought.

'Your request for a company vehicle has been approved, however, it's not the Cadillac you wanted. Since you need the exercise, you're getting a skateboard.'

Adios Amoebas

Scientist to scientist looking in microscope: 'Be careful - they sense fear.'

'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

"What I really hate is preventive medicine. They go after us before we even do anything."

Tetracycline: Bicycle built for 4 organisms.'

Sporozoa: One of the earliest philosophers.

Center for disease control - I'd like you to meet Dr. Blumenkraft, he's our top mucous man

"You've heard of that new virus that's been going around? It's me!"

God: 'Man has dominion over fish...beasts...and germs have dominion over man.'

"Smacked down by reality in 24 seconds."

'I don't know what this is, but you should see how fast it's growing!'

'The anaerobic ones are just sitting there, but the aerobic bacteria are doing jumping jacks, sit-up, leg lifts....'

Friendly bacteria of the human gut.

The Bacteria Bowl

'My favorites are Leeuwenhoek, who proved we exist, and Pasteur, who showed the world we have some clout.'

"Whatever."