Mice Avoider Gifts

Woman on back of chair, mouse on the arm and cat on the floor.

"You couldn't just stop and ask directions, could you?"

Welcome Sufferers of Stage Fright

'As a bachelor I have to wash my own clothes, clean my own room. The do it all again three months later.'

"We may be stick in here for a while..."

Wow, look what you've stepped in: Boy I'm glad I'm not the one having to lick it off...

Free range cat food - mice running around the store.

There's leftover apple crisp! Whoever finishes it up, please clean the baking dish. Hey! It's not finished!!

Young Peel worries about visiting Scotland.

"Back to face-to-face working, lad? I think not! Be off home with you!"

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

'IN my fantasy league, we're not allowed to pick players from teams named after cats.'

'The one thing I hate about summer - great big moths coming in at night.'

"You're research is very promising. It's just a shame you're afraid of mice"

Not in the mood for human interaction line

How to Tell when You're Asking for Directions from a NASCAR Fan: 'Make a left, then hang a left, take another left followed by a left...'

"Someplace with no dogs."

'Remember, Son -- build a better mouse trap and an angry mob will beat a path to your door.'

'Yeah, I guess I have kind of let it go.'

'Careful, it might be a trap...'

'That must be some mouse! Hang on while I get my shotgun.'

'We saw a mouse!'

'Is there a machine that's not in front of mirrors? I know what I look like...that's why I am here.'

'You just had to throw the manual out didn't you? Big man can figure everything out for himself...'

'Not only must she love dogs, but she must hate cats.'

'Look on the bright side, we're surrounded by water: We're safe from cats...'

'I didn't get the memo. I like not getting memos.'

"Me, I'm not nocturnal by nature, but by choice: I try to avoid human-contact as much as I can..."

'Get rid of your microwave -- at least that'll delay your meals a little.'

'I put a dab of Pine-Sol behind each ear and my husband thinks I've been cleaning all day.'

"Sorry I've run over your cat... Please allow me to replace it!"

'Take no prisoners!'

"I want to show my Missus what happens to guys like you."

Woman afraid of a snail.