Mess-tamer Pillows

"Good news. It wasn't a toxic chemical leak. It was an old pizza in your kid's room."

'Just look at this carpet! I guess what they say is true. Nature does indeed abhor a vacuum.'

The unorganised organiser.

"Remember...when the going gets tough...DELEGATE!"

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

Multi-tasking.

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

Why would birdie need newspaper?

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

Child Being Dirty in the Bath.

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

Toddler Feeding Solutions

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

"Just put that in my, 'I'll get to it when I can, I'm only human' pile."

"And this is our son Danny's room. Danny is being raised by wolves."

Parenting Business Deals

New Swiss Army Knife

'You know that bottle of ink that was standing on the desk...?'

'Thank goodness for clumsy children: A spilt ice-cream!'

'Look! It's superwoman...and all her assistants!'

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'Before we start, would everyone please put your cell phone in the middle of the table?'

College student cleans messy dorm room littered with clothes with leafsnow blower

"I find that my strongest passwords are those created when the cat walks across the keyboard."

'...and this is the Mess.'

Fat Kid 31- Pet slug runs amok

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

"Most projects require three hands."

'Mr Godzilla - you need anger management!'

"Can I help it if dirt is attracted to me?"