Merriment Maker Gifts

Bah, humbug. As if worrying about pigeon droppings wasn't bad enough.

Merry Christmas!

"Couldn't I just blow you a kiss?"

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

Tigers brass band, "Tiger rag-that's what it's all about."

May your Christmas be full of harmony

"There's no need to be em'bear'rassed about what you like!"

'I'd like to tell you all about it, dear, but what happens in Joe's Bar STAYS in Joe's Bar.'

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

Little Piano

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

Closed for the Foreseeable Future

"How many times have I told you? Stop playing on the stairs!"

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

Piano Bar

'My fortune says you're a liar, so I won't even ask what yours says.'

Cats play the double bass

'I'm sorry, I laughed when I saw you in spite of myself!'

"Hava Nagila" go-round.

Prosecco and Pudding

Drunk Golfer.

'I got 50p - how much did you get?'

"It's OK, Trump will pardon me."

'Uh ho. I wouldn't venture outside on the 24th December if I were you.'

'Don't look now, but the winner of last season's 'The Biggest Heckler' is here.'

It's our editorial opinion that you DESERVE a very Merry Christmas.

Cats pull a Christmas cracker and find a mouse inside.

Wrap music

Supper.

"Don't worry dear. I won't spoil her anymore than you can afford."