Merriment Maker Gifts

Bah, humbug. As if worrying about pigeon droppings wasn't bad enough.

Merry Christmas!

"Couldn't I just blow you a kiss?"

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

Tigers brass band, "Tiger rag-that's what it's all about."

May your Christmas be full of harmony

"There's no need to be em'bear'rassed about what you like!"

'I'd like to tell you all about it, dear, but what happens in Joe's Bar STAYS in Joe's Bar.'

Little Piano

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

Closed for the Foreseeable Future

"How many times have I told you? Stop playing on the stairs!"

Piano Bar

'My fortune says you're a liar, so I won't even ask what yours says.'

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

The dark secret about where the Easter Bunny gets the candy...

Cats play the double bass

'I'm sorry, I laughed when I saw you in spite of myself!'

"Hava Nagila" go-round.

Prosecco and Pudding

Drunk Golfer.

Bourbon Street signs: Party and Sober Up.

"What about this: we steal from the rich and give it to political action committees?"

'I got 50p - how much did you get?'

"It's OK, Trump will pardon me."

'Uh ho. I wouldn't venture outside on the 24th December if I were you.'

It's our editorial opinion that you DESERVE a very Merry Christmas.

Cats pull a Christmas cracker and find a mouse inside.

Supper.

"Don't worry dear. I won't spoil her anymore than you can afford."