Mercenary T-Shirts

Jones or Best Offer

'That's Olafson -- He's a mercenary.'

"Your mommy, Caitlin, is a hired gun."

Torture Insurance

Torture Insurance

Dying Large in Iraq

"This is the rendezvous point where you'll make contact with the target and organically bring up if he things I'm cool."

Married to a professional mercenary

Mercenary

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Fifteen

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

'Now I know why the strategy guide warned against entering the 5th stage. Awesome!'

"Oh dear, it's just as we suspected.. they do come from another planet."

Watch the skies: UFO buffs all stare at the sky, yet alien is amongst them.

"I'm looking for something really dull and repetitive."

"Sir, a bunch of bald-headed, castrated humanoids wearing Nikes just materialised with their luggage back there."

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

"Wow! You do have a triple A membership!"

'Hello Mr Preston? This is an ALIEN speaking. We have landed in your paddock. We have mutilated your cows. We have made loud crashing noises...what the hell is on your TV that's so special?'

Elevator Music

"A glimpse into a cartoon character's dressing room..."

An alien tries to hitch a lift at the side of the road

Welcome: Skeptics Society

Giorgio A. Tsoukalos - Ancient Aliens

' Can I borrow change for the bus? With the cost of gas, I just can't justify buzzing around the city in that thing.'

'Can you believe it? - The doofus doesn't know whether this is the Alpha Quadrant or not!'

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."