Mental State Navigators Mugs

"Has anyone seen my therapist?"

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

Surfing the daily stress

* For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

The Map of the Human Heart

'Occasionally the Dr. asks me to get real with people.'

"But what if this is all there is?"

I applied for a job with NASA but they turned me down. I think it was because I told them I wanted to be an astronaut because in space, you can't cry because there's no gravity and tears can't flow.

The Wishing Well

'Do you want to reschedule? Normally he has a magnetic personality, but today he seems to have reversed polarity.'

'He's never there for me.'

Twice a year, Uncle Mort and Sadie Cohen have an official relationship talk. While this biannual conversation is scheduled by mutual consent under long-standing treaty, some participants engage grudgingly. Let's talk about our feelings. I don't feel like it. That's not a feeling, Snookums! Loophole!

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

"Only time can heal a broken heart, Brenda, and fortunately I have the time, every Thursday at three o'clock."

"Adolescence can be a very trying time, Mr. Alcorn."

"I know he's little, but he uses it."

"You're sucking all the fun out of my misery."

You're bottling things up, aren't you?

'Watch your step, counselor; I can go from zero to bitch in 3.2 seconds.'

"If I didn't worry all the time what would I do with myself?"

"People can bridge the great distance between the Earth and the Moon..."

"I feel we're almost down to bedrock, Mr. Bonwell."

"I get the feeling you're still keeping a lot of yourself inside."

STRIP *Community Care * Office rage"

"I broke off the relationship, then came the endless reminders, the sad letters and emails...It's tough cancelling a subscription."

"To tell you the truth, I never thought downward mobility would be so, well, downward."

"You were always my favorite to guilt-trip."

"One day, son, all this anxiety will be yours."

Florist.

"You seem very remote."

'Yes, he's neurotic - It's a common condition with neurologists.'

Question man

"He doesn't have a single redeeming quality, he's just disrupting and awful and repulsive, and he has no consideration for other people's feelings."

"We may have the same ringtone, Kenneth, but they're in totally different keys."

"Let's be considerate of your wife's opinion and discuss her point that you're an idiot."