Mensa Wannabe Prints

"How on earth do you get this blasted box to open...?"

'Most of all, I'd like to thank god. . .'

'I think winning that last hand went to Bob's head, because he now has an entourage.'

As Seen On TV

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

Entrance code to MENSA club - 'To enter, simply type in the square root of Pi.'

"Ohhh... He's out all right!"

'What do you mean you don't believe I'm really a Princess?'

"I am a ninja rabbit. I am stealth personified. I am one of the unseen. I am now invisible...Darn."

"There comes a time, Little Buddy, when you have to just accept that you'll never be famous....that your life will never be adapted for television and that when you die, only five or six people will truly care."

Everyone in Tinseltown deserves 15 minutes of obscurity.

Before and After Tattoos.

Your Ticket to Fame and Fortune...sold out.

"I'm going to demonstrate how dogs are stealth ninjas in the dark. See how I move silently....."

"I think you are getting carried away, all you've done is finish one crossword."

'Thank you. Do you mind if I spray it about like they do on tv?'

In-law country

Gag t-shirt for Mensa members.

Mensa Cat

'Don't they ever go down with their ruddy gondolas?'

'Selma never had a lesson in her life. She picked up all that noise on her own.'

"Well, if we're playing tackle football I'll be the coach!"

"It's the ultimate in smart phones. It's the Mensa phone."

Businessman of the Year Awards.

"Carry yourself like everyone knows you, ad everyone you meet will feel like they should know you."

"When you can sneak up on me, without my knowledge, then, and only then, can you consider yourself a true Ninja!"

"We're only here summers, but Roger likes to be taken for a local."