Mens Health Prints

'It may be more inconvenient, but the 'Reverse Prostate Exam' is a lot less embarrassing for the both of us.'

Prostate Exam Second Opinion

'We don't like to call it baldness, Mr. Glemmer. Here, we say you have an enhanced scalp.'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

2021

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

"We've made great progress!"

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

What the Doctor Ordered

'Well, well, well...'

Lactose Intolerant

"Your contents have shifted."

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

PSA Banter.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

Bad for you but to die for

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."