Memer-in-chief Pillows

You like my new beard, Randy? What beard? You don't have a beard. You mean you haven't seen my status update? I photoshopped a beard on all my pictures. If enough people "like" it, I'll grow it in real life. Facebook is not meant as a Beta test for life. I know. I used Instagram.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

Text Culture

Moo Out Loud

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

'City Traders - The Complete Menagerie'

'We'll be outsourcing Main Street.'

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

'As you know, medical costs have skyrocketed -- that'll be fifty cents.'

When you said the cat was hacking down here, I assumed you meant a hairball.

'We're under a lot of time-pressure here, so we'll need to jump to conclusions.'

"Any further comments? Alright then, we're adjourned."

'It's been a tough quarter, so in lieu of bonuses, you'll all be receiving a DVD of out-takes from our meetings.'

Man with post it note

"It drives me MAD when people act as though we've nothing to do except write moronic memorandum."

'I apologize for sending out the meeting memo late. Let me summarize by saying that the entire board is being replaced starting tomorrow.'

"There is only one thing worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about. Lol. Winky face."

Buzzfeed does The Bible: 10 commandments that will blow your mind.

'It was here when Harris decided to 'tweak' things a bit...'

"Does our improvement really need to be so continuous?"

"We're not doing virtual meetings anymore, Stu."

The Web is mightier than the sword.

'Home haircuts for the family portrait.'

Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough...

21st Century Malaise-Attention-Seeking-Disorder

'If youth is wasted on youth, I'd just as well spend my time social networking.'

"I'm going out on a limb here, and sincerely apologize to my constituents today for the misappropriations and bribes I will take if I'm elected governor."

God sends a text message: 'OMME!'

'Am I on your good Facebook friend list, or on your bad Facebook friend list?'

'Well, according to this website, the internet no longer exists!'

"Dislocating your jaw yawning during my lecture on work related injuries is NOT a work related injury!"

'Maybe the first couple of times, but believe me, the 'Are you following my Tweets' is no longer funny.'

"Any missed assignments can be excused only with a note from your internet service provider."

"And then I met some computer people who could make it look as if I were talking."