Melody Matcher Gifts

'Norbert, he's playing our ring tone.'

At the Goldilocks Music Store albums are labeled: 'Too Many Notes,' 'Too Few Notes,' 'Too loud,' 'Too Soft,' and 'Just Right.'

"No. You tune to me. I have perfect pitch."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

New music conference

"We have a song, but neither of us can remember it."

Preparing for casual dress friday at the investment bank.

Birds with Headphones

"No, I'm still getting too much banjo."

'Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream...'

'It's a bloody-cross-breed.'

'I hate the moods yuo wake up in!'

"It's over between us, Kevin, I've met a most wonderful cod!"

'This one writes some fine lyrics, and the other one has composed some beautiful music, but they just done't seem to hit it off as collaborators.'

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Congerto Number One, first movement."

Record department with rock, crossover and classical sections.

"The big challenge now is to get them to mate in captivity."

A dog banging a snare drum.

"Your Father's just in a bad mood."

Wee Acid Hoose - Drugs and Scottish Reels

Bach Doubles

Romance Music

"Is it copyright violation if I plagiarize a plagiarized song?"

Beethoven's 10th

'I doubled my money! The bank dude gave me 20 50-cent-coins for lousy ten one-euro-coins!'

The Many Moods of Produce: Bitter Melon, Passion Fruit, Sour Cherries, Sweet Potato.

Another Programme Reminding You How Much Better Music Used To Be.

House trained cat

'I'm flattered you want to share your life with me, but since this is our date, why don't we just trying sharing music files and see how that goes?'

'Playing out of tune doesn't make it a remix!'

Suddenly, on the 18th tee at Augusta, Leonard whales on his air guitar right in the middle of a backswing.

Mood Swings

My Dog Scratch