Melody Master T-Shirts

'I don't like your tone, Mr Baines.'

'If only I could write music that would have that much influence over people.'

'The problem with Jr. High Choral is that between the auditions and the concert, 20% of the voices can change.'

"I'm sorry, but because of recent budget cuts we will no longer be able to use the key of 'G'!"

Musicians.

Marketed music.

"Gets it done in half the time!"

'The Trumpet Compulsory.'

'My mum can play the piano by ear.'

Harpist

'Incredibly Inexpensive Sound Engineers. Pretty Good Sound Engineers, 12 the price, 23 the quality. You'll hardly notice the occasional feedback.'

Covid and Concerts

my boyfriend's a music producer...

Trumpet

Prince

Giuseppe Verdi

Musical washing

"Easy day at school. Spelling was easy as ABC, math was easy as one two three, and music was easy as Do Re Mi."

Organ Player

"If she has the voice of an angel I sure hope the others drown her out."

'And exactly how long has 'The Funky Gibbon' been stuck in your head?' - Rufus McPhee, musical exorcist.

Michail Glinka

"I was kind of hoping for 'new voices' who'd also sung before."

Bob Dylan as a baby.

Sight test with a violin.

'It's not that I don't like you, you're just too upbeat for me.'

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

Violin

"Well, we've for the melody down now, but I'm still not sure about the part where it goes, '...and they call the wind Dorcas Schnickelbaum.'"

Yeah, I'm a songbird, but I'd rather be known as a singer/songwriter.

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

Marimba

'They all want to play the star.'

Guitarist

"Let's say you've always wanted to make someone a mixtape to show them how much you care about them. What's the best order? Do you start with songs about how rich you are before moving on to the songs about love? Or vice versa?. . .What order would best simulate sincerity?"