Meeting Someone Special Gifts

"Patty and Glen met at the Opera. Rich and I met at the beach. Where did you two meet?"

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

Doug had trouble getting home at a decent hour.

Out and In.

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

Group Think Time

'We haven't improved quality, but we've made it easier to return.'

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

'It's a lateral move, you'll now be getting all of Kramer's work too.'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

Networking

'Before we start, shall we go round the table, and each share our name and a horrible dark secret from our past.'

"That's six 'noes' and one 'aye', the ayes have it"

"At least we are consistently inconsistent."

'Anyone who opposes the plan I'm about to propose please signify by saying 'I resign.''

'This prediction has a margin of error of plus or minus fifteen...fifteen class-action suits brought against the company.'

"Help! I'm surrounded by idiots."

"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."

"We made a miscalculation, but it's consistent with our over-all strategy."

'Congratulations, Yomp - we're giving you a bigger carrot!'

"Look , Malcolm, I get it that you're ambitious. But can't you put that damn thing down just for a minute?"

'Herb will provide one of his concise interpretations of the quarterly sales charts.'

"I can give you a little bit of focus on 2:53 next Thursday."