Meeting Motivator Pillows

"We finally found a way to bottle enthusiasm."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

"I'm Jackson, your new micro-manager."

'I've stepped on so many people for the last 20 years to get where I'm at, and I'm still only a middle manager.'

"I always try to give out at least one genuine compliment per day. I don't always succeed."

GCSEs

"Best project manager we ever had."

We Have A Lot To Cover.....

'All in favor of just laughing it off, say ha, ha, ha.'

'Come on, Walter, you're wasting out time! Stop using complete sentences!'

"You're wondering why I've called you here."

When we believe together we achieve together.

'Great idea, Philpott. Wish you'd thought of it.'

'To address this mistake we must use root-cause analysis. I'll begin by saying it's not my fault.'

'A good leader can lead them to water, but a great leader can also make them drink.'

"Dammit, Higgins, we don't need simple explanations, we need complicated excuses!"

Office Politics

'We'll also need to do a credit/blame analysis.'

We're one big happy family here. What I'm looking for is a man who can make it work.

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

'I've drawn up a health and safety policy for the company.'

"Do we want to tackle this head on, or just stun it with a glancing blow until Monday?"

'Sir, Ms. Selby is here for your 3:00 meeting.'

"Why don't you try learning from your own mistakes?"

Suggestion box: 'Build a bigger Complaints box'.

People, what a fantastic opportunity for a reset!

Sinking sales

"Yes, we do have an incentive scheme - fall below that line and you're sacked."

'And one, and two, and three, and don't get discouraged Manatee, and four, and five...'

'You're my best employee. You're punctual, ambitious and precise. The problem is ... it scares the devil out of my other employees.'

'How are we supposed to think the unthinkable if we have to drink the drinkable?'