Meditation Mishap Pillows

'It's very noticeable when I'm down wind from you. There's something dead inside, you should see a specialist.'

'The creative process works best with a relaxed brain, so I'm letting my mind wander to let a solution drift in.'

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"Do you guys serve beer?"

"What do I do to relieve stress? I meditate, about not working here."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

My God, I need to fart.

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"I'm still looking for the lap of luxury."

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

Meditation

Annoying neighbours - irritating wind chimes

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

Taking a little mental vacation can help as long as you don't go to mental.

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

'It says, 'Life is like a transistor.''

'I'll be back in three or four months - Hold that thought.'

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

"It's ok -- It's the Enlightenment Channel."

"... and this is Carol’s stupid meditation room."

'We've got truth, we've got enlightenment, and we've got serenity - what we NEED is media coverage.'

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

'It's normal -- Enlightenment freaks a lot of people out.'

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

"The answers to the questions you seek could also be found on Google."

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

'I understand the Adirondacks are where it's REALLY happening.'

Grok's Thought Stopping.

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

"To listen to your instincts, press one."

"And this is my cousin Dave, who handles the conventional wisdom."