Medieval Mischief Mugs

"The monarch appreciates your wit, but thinks your timing sucks."

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

"Billy, we don't need to feed that vacuum robot."

'I didn't want to get the napkin messy.'

The Tooth Ferret

'The king wants a gesture, not a jester.'

Knights

"It's my wife - she's trying to lure ships to their doom!"

"Hey, were it up to me, you'd be here for another few days, but then I'm not your insurance company."

"Hmm. . . it looks like he was struck on the head with a blunt object. . . If only I could find out what the murder weapon could be. . ."

'Little Nurse' daughter trying to distract Daddy so he cuts himself shaving

"...And I cheated at solitaire...twice."

God creates humans.

DING DONG!

"First they're sending in the diplomats."

"Heh, I've left a pin on his seat."

'What's my fortune then?!

"Good morning, beheaded—uh, I mean beloved."

'I can't undo anything - I've forgot my toolbox!'

'What are you complaining about...they told you this was MINOR surgery!'

A trap for Santa

"That's not the boiling oil, that's my casserole!"

"I'm not a rule breaker, but the no eye blinking is going to be a tough one."

'I never dreamed that Lady Godiva would run AGAINST me!'

Santa's sleigh up on cinder blocks.

"By the way, your insurance doesn't cover these tests...JUST KIDDING! That was the stress test."

"Well, it seems that St. Patrick didn't drive all the snakes out of Ireland."

"I should've never taught you to shake."

'What's the score?'

Those bubble wrap kids.

One C Battery, Two Double A's.