Medical Tech Lovers Gifts

Health Care Parade

'We don't have a cure for your ailment but there is an appropriate app available.'

"Hiya, Beautiful! What's your access code?"

'Still no improvement? Nurse, attach more gizmos.'

'Having all this information on my patient's diagnostics is great, but I think I need a degree in data analytics to sort it all out...'

"Just think of this prescription as an app for your body...with side effects."

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

Hold on - it may take a few minutes for his new pacemaker to sync with his Fitbit.

Medical Bling: "Help!" on a rope, Important info, O2 4U, Snazzy 3-prong

'Our new multi-syringe will take care of all your allergies in one fell swoop.'

"The patient handed me this 'wearable technology' and said 'all the answers are on there'."

'This new diet drug comes as a pill, patch, or as a phone app with Siri saying, don't eat so much.'

We'd like to run a few tests to see how this thing works.

Save the bacon,

"I'm getting the hang of the patient portal. It reminded me to refill my beta blocker, but I keep getting ads. Can you prescribe a good pop-up blocker too?"

Patient

In an effort to lure a younger generation of sailors the sirens start using autotune.

Nurse sharpening a needle before an injection.

'Of course it's not downloading your iTunes. That's your 24-hour heart monitor.'

"I feel fine but according to my new watch I might be DEAD!"

'Call Maintenance...I need them to check the output on this defibrillator.'

"I'd hate to be hooked up to that thing."

"The good news is your virus is gone. The bad news is it infected your electronic health records."

Dr. Jarvik, and his lesser known invention, the artificial soul.

'Oops! Turn down the power on this lazer thing, will you.'

"Don't worry, Mr. Jones. The fact that doctors still use pagers doesn't mean the hospital has outdated equipment!"

"Your electronic medical records were accidentally deleted. You'll have to start over again with acne."

"You have to admit, it was funny...even the paramedics were laughing!"

'You'll have to disrobe... what I have here is a new improved Proctoscope.'

'I can't examine you, but your health insurance does allow you access to a self-diagnosing website.'

'It monitors your life signs -- we call it the 'grim beeper.''

Clockwork doctor.

"They're working miracles with felt-tipped markers these day!"

Plug in Stethoscope

'Wait 'til you see our new defibrillator. It's a Michael Graves design.'