Medical History Guru Gifts

"I can't wait until we convert to electronic health records. Carry these is giving me backache."

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

"We're doing everything we can to make him comfortable, short of dressing up as male doctors."

PHARMACY, 'Tell Hippocrates to write his prescriptions in Greek -- I can't read Babylonian!'

'Feed a cold, starve the plague.'

Cures for Ye Plague

'These young doctors know nothing, I used to see 500 patients every day...'

Edward Jenner

'Medical science is this close to finding a cure for the common evil vapors.'

Leeches, lucky charms, rat catching. The secretary of health is in.

Early Blood Draw

John Snow

Asylum; May contain patients with mental problems.

"Milton finally found a doctor he can trust - one who still believes in the healing power of money."

An early medical case ripe for a malpractice lawsuit.

"So why is it that we only get to see you whenever you need a gruesome amputation?"

Antique Ailments

"We use leeches on the test subjects and slugs on the control group."

'In this practice we like to have the best of the old with the best of the new.'

Consultation of Physicians.

"We'll be performing the operation using original instruments."

Early Anaesthesia

Florence Nightingale

"You've omitted your previous patient experience and recommendations from two other doctors."

"How come we don't start plagues any more? Are we one of those boring couples?"

"They just don't make 'em like Doc Malone anymore!"

Lady Physicians

Historic Medical Moments: The first time a body rejected a heart before it was transplanted.

Rene Laennec

"Look, the generic ones are just as good, and your insurance doesn't cover the brand leeches."

Doctors Through the Ages...

"On certain types of wounds we use lawyers instead of leeches because lawyers never seem to get their fill of blood..."

Press Conference

Hippocrates