Medical History Gifts

Florence Nightingale

"You've omitted your previous patient experience and recommendations from two other doctors."

Medical practicioner speaking to his apprentice

Man with a wooden leg asking to be measured for a pair of boots

"What?"

'Mark my words! If we physicians allow the establishment of a nursing profession...'

"I just don't know - Hipppocrates says one thing, Galen says another thing, and Vesalius says something entirely different."

Computer in medical museum as a prosthetic

"Ralph is proud of his urinal collection."

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

"We're doing everything we can to make him comfortable, short of dressing up as male doctors."

'Feed a cold, starve the plague.'

'Hey, this guy's been operated on before!'

Cures for Ye Plague

PHARMACY, 'Tell Hippocrates to write his prescriptions in Greek -- I can't read Babylonian!'

Edward Jenner

'Medical science is this close to finding a cure for the common evil vapors.'

Leeches, lucky charms, rat catching. The secretary of health is in.

Early Blood Draw

John Snow

"Milton finally found a doctor he can trust - one who still believes in the healing power of money."

Asylum; May contain patients with mental problems.

An early medical case ripe for a malpractice lawsuit.

Antique Ailments

"So why is it that we only get to see you whenever you need a gruesome amputation?"

'In this practice we like to have the best of the old with the best of the new.'

"We use leeches on the test subjects and slugs on the control group."

Consultation of Physicians.

"We'll be performing the operation using original instruments."

Early Anaesthesia

"How come we don't start plagues any more? Are we one of those boring couples?"

"They just don't make 'em like Doc Malone anymore!"

"On certain types of wounds we use lawyers instead of leeches because lawyers never seem to get their fill of blood..."

Rene Laennec

"Look, the generic ones are just as good, and your insurance doesn't cover the brand leeches."