Mechanical Surgeon T-Shirts

'Voltage meter!'

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

Ice Cream Surgeon

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

Stoneage puncture repair kit...

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"And I want you to meet Coco, your anesthesiologist."

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

Medical Building Directory: Dr. Larry Nix, Dr. Sally Putty, etc..

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

Haute Suture

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

Drool Marks

Walking Luggage.

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

'But they told me to take her down to theatre...'

'ooh! A womb with a view.'

'Maybe it is psychosomatic.'

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

'My electric car is giving me static!'

Young Dr. Dolittle.