Mechanic's Storytelling Buddy T-Shirts

'They don't make cars like this any more -- the country that built them disappeared.'

Electric Blanket.

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

'Your car should run fine now. I reformatted the hard drive, increased the ram, scanned for viruses, updated the firmware, upgraded to this year's processor...'

Snow White and the Seven Dorks.

'Found your problem - there was a hairball in the gasline.'

Every time one of us gets a new head, those two think it's funny to call it "the changing of the gourd."

"It's garage music."

'Well, if I have a short circuit, just lengthen it.'

Auto Mechanic's Confessional Booth

'Batteries not included, it's a real cat.'

"I keep hearing a knocking noise."

The Rarely Seen Gas-Powered Eel

"I know there's nothing wrong with the carburetor. I'm just interested in the stories it has to tell."

'Oh, well, I had to take it in to get the oil changed anyway.'

"They said it had a V-8, so I assumed it would run on tomato juice!"

"Tell Santa that Rudolph's check engine light is on."

'I think I found your missing nut.'

"One CC of lubricant after meals, okay?"

'Try it now.'

"Just what I thought... Bad shock absorbers."

'M.O.T. certificate?!...a death certificate's the best I can do.'

"This IS Cinderella Sire, you should see her two ugly sisters!"

It's only firing on 87 cylinders.

Clancy: Car Repairs

"Your husband's going to pull through, but your differential is shot!"

'It refuses to stop at garage sales!'

'Pop the hood. I think your inverted Republican fiscal flux capacitor is slowing you down.'

Unnatural Food-nuts and bolts, sale on junk foods, rusty nuts, bolts, and screws.

'I wish you'd stop recounting boyhood stories with the phrase, 'Back when I was your height'.'

"I agree, it's a lot of bang for the buck. And thumping, whining, clicking, clacking, clanging, grinding, buzzing and rattling."

"With some rest, vitamins and mild exercise, that metal fatigue should clear up in just a few weeks!"

Robot Sculpture

Windscreen replacement

"Me?! I thought you brought a washer!"