Mechanic In Need Of A Laugh T-Shirts

Clancy: Car Repairs

Electric Blanket.

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

'Your car should run fine now. I reformatted the hard drive, increased the ram, scanned for viruses, updated the firmware, upgraded to this year's processor...'

World's cheapest car

'I think I've got a screw loose.'

'We've found the problem...'

"It's garage music."

'Well, if I have a short circuit, just lengthen it.'

'Found your problem - there was a hairball in the gasline.'

Every time one of us gets a new head, those two think it's funny to call it "the changing of the gourd."

'They don't make cars like this any more -- the country that built them disappeared.'

All you'd expect in a British car!

Auto Mechanic's Confessional Booth

"See what I mean, it keeps making funny noises."

'Batteries not included, it's a real cat.'

"They said it had a V-8, so I assumed it would run on tomato juice!"

The Rarely Seen Gas-Powered Eel

'I think I found your missing nut.'

"Clean your wallet, sir?"

"One CC of lubricant after meals, okay?"

'Try it now.'

"Just what I thought... Bad shock absorbers."

"Yup, brakes are shot. Lemme check to see if I have any size ten in stock."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders.

'M.O.T. certificate?!...a death certificate's the best I can do.'

Electric Car Giving Driver Static.

"It's nothing serious...just a flooded engine."

Unnatural Food-nuts and bolts, sale on junk foods, rusty nuts, bolts, and screws.

Car Carriage

"Your husband's going to pull through, but your differential is shot!"

"I agree, it's a lot of bang for the buck. And thumping, whining, clicking, clacking, clanging, grinding, buzzing and rattling."

"With some rest, vitamins and mild exercise, that metal fatigue should clear up in just a few weeks!"

Need for oil?

Hell's elevator/Up to no good.