Meat-loving Maven Pillows

"Hurry, dear, it's the Brutal Gourmet."

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

"States of tofu"

Muscles

'Steak Ted?'

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"Rump roast?"

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

Important Food Groups

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

"Forget sugar and spice and everything nice. I'm going for buns of steel!"

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

Butcher's shop has 'Cuts of salami' sign: End, Middle, Other End.

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Cow of BEEF

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

Would you mind putting the barbecue out?

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

Platter confusion.

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

A butcher announcing he will kill his own meat

"We get all our meat from a man dressed like a butcher."

"I'll see your Sirloin and raise you a New York Strip."

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

"Oooh... bacon!"

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

'A lovely day, a good meal, and, thank heaven, no guilt.'

"Some protein with my salad? Sure, put a 24 ounce Ribeye in it."

'Sorry, you're just not built right for weightlifting.'