Measurement Debaters Gifts

Things were Running Smooth at Inchworm Town until...

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

Skeptic Tank.

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

Changing Minds

"Buzz off, Fly-boy. We don't need more accessories."

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

I thought I was proposing to Sally, but evidently I was challenging her to a twenty year series of debates.

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'

'I'm still not sure HOW it happened. One minute, we were bouncing ideas off each other, and the next thing I knew, we were using furniture instead!'

"And you need to know this why?"

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

'You present a very convincing argument.'

"You want answers?" "I want the truth!" "You can't handle the infinite explanation of cosmological arguments relating to the truth!"

"In this one, references to everything have been deleted."

"Remember, God created you. Evolution will get you left behind."

The Epic Battle Over Anthony Kennedy's Replacement Is the Charadiest of All Charades Ever

The only Universal Truths that all religions agree upon.

"Then I told him, 'Unions are powerless in this country... What can you do to me?'"

"Do you have a few minutes to talk about the metric system?"

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

"Nonsense - we're far less religious than you are."

With Liberty handcuffed,,the thought police pursue happiness,

Man sees signs on door of the debating society; "Tonight: Is time travel possible? Gone out back 10 minutes ago."

"So Jesus, what denomination are you?"

'No, make the dominant race out of placental mammals — marsupials would lead to all kind of abortion controversies.'

Play It Safe

If there were no religion...s

"Dad, I need $5 for the annual debate team adventure camp."

"Let's just agree to disagree." "I suggested that first!"

This Bus Runs on Punditry

'What did you say? 'The light is nothing but an ordinary streetlamp'? Oh no! My own son is an atheist??!'