Meaning Of Life Ponderer Gifts

"If, indeed, there is a reason for all this, than that's so much worse."

'That's it?'

Man using internet search engine: 'I'm trying to find myself,'

'I've been up here almost a month now -- when do we get paid?'

'That's right. I took all your money and didn't teach you a darn thing -- enlightening, isn't it?'

'Meaning of life, eh? -- Who wants to know?'

'It's normal -- Enlightenment freaks a lot of people out.'

"But what if this is all there is?"

"The meaning of life? Funny you should ask."

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"He's his own worst enemy."

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Sauce for the Goose

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"Needs to get a life"

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

I don't think I'm letting sunlight in when I open the curtains. I think the darkness is going out.

"I think you'll find the pen is writier than the sword."

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."