Math Maniac Gifts

Having conducted a survey of 32.4% of the 56.6% of tax experts about 43% of the budget we found an 87.6% probability that we haven't got the foggiest ideas of what it means.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

'The path to becoming an astronaut is rougher than I thought.'

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

"Or we could tally the sheep like this."

'Maths is fun!'

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'I have to agree -- the value of pie goes on indefinitely.'

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

'190 divided by two...'

Graduation Speech.

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

"When the teacher explained negative numbers, I suddenly understood how politicians 'deficit spend'."

"That was Copernicus on the phone – he says you're NOT the centre of the universe!"

'If 'x' is unknown, why should I rock the boat?'