Maternity Ward Staff T-Shirts

"You know what they say, there's one born every minute!"

"We don't do 'returns'!"

"Where's Waldo Jr.?"

Nursery: 'Hey ya jerk! You're taking two spaces.'

Native American baby in a nursery.

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Get me this...get me that...fluff my pillow...I don't feel well...if I wanted to listen to that all day, I wouldn't have left my husband!"

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

Dancing Doctor

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

"Don't wait up. I'll be working late again tonight."

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

'We tend to favour more traditional anaesthetic techniques here.'

'Sorry, staff shortage.'

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

"Nurse, when I asked you to make the patient more comfortable I just meant plump up his pillows!"

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

"This will be a tricky operation."

'I do need your bed, Mr. Davies, for me, I'm shattered after working twenty-six hours non stop.'

Mr. Evers specifically asked for a plain coffee, not an espresso.

'It's not easy being fabulous and caretaking.'

'I told you not to complain about the hospital food!'

'Oh, well... Accidents will happen.'

'Nurse, I said x-ray, not microwave.'