Matchstick Enthusiast Pillows

'Where are you guys going?' - 'We are going on strike.'

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

Lovers

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

'Fred, don't you think you're over doing it a bit?'

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

'But how can we be sure the dating service didn't make a mistake?'

If it's any consolation, you burned the bejeezus out of his finger.

'Assuming moral absolutes - good dog.'

Man sticking matchsticks together for Bryant and May

'I'm afraid we don't have any gentlemen on hand right now -- how about a good old boy?'

'I find it more effective to walk softly and carry a BIGGER stick.'

Match Point

"I'm not looking for Mr.Right, Just Mr. Swipe-right!"

Bryant and May match heads

"It looks like the champ has finally me his match!!"

His And Her T-shirts

"I think they'll be perfect together. He's a journalist and she's a complete composite."

"You want to see me, Boss?"

"Dad, this is Keith. Keith works in the timber industry."

'There's no stopping them.'

Couple in Green

'Trust me honey, Aunt Iris says he's a Prince!'

'I'm waiting for the right introduction agency to come along.'

'I'd like to meet a girl--', 'Oh, a homophobe, eh?'

'Oh sure, Rupert's lovely, but his mate's a total slime-bag.'

Chance Meeting

'Most of my customers met online.'

"My Man Utd top's still in the wash"

There's a factory up here making something exported to earth? Yeah, people down there want a match made in heaven!

Matchstick Taj Mahal