Master Of Awkward Moments Pillows

"I wear it whenever I sack someone, I think it makes it less traumatic."

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

Always an awkward moment when you meet a Dung Beetle...

"A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something."

"You and your daft inventions."

'Well this is awkward.'

"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."

"Ignore the screams, sir. I'll get a new fork."

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.

"If that girl sent over a double cappuccino, maybe you should go talk to her!"

"On a scale of 1-10, how painfully awkward is this?"

'Look. . . for the last time, I'm not playin' 'footsie' with you!'

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

"I think that one is a little too honest."

A close encounter of the awkward kind

"... And since then, I've been quietly stalking you."

Hey dad, is that the boss guy that you said can talk out of his butt?

'I know I said you could take me home but I didn't mean to your place!'

"Of course mating is natural. It's just not the kind of thing you want to see your parents doing."

Spinach Dating.

"Let’s try another one. Jerry blinked, Kate’s giving Jon the finger, and Jess is choking."

"Well, right now I'm feeling a little uncomfortable."

Jack's first meeting with Melanie's parents, suddenly turned awkward.

'Some things are better left unsaid but I never know what they are until after I've said them.'

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

"Mum, Dad, where was I downloaded from?"

"There's a little jelly or something on your chin."

"Nice going, idiot! You just blew the first impression."

"Michael. ... That's my sleazeball of an ex-husband's name."

"I'm guessing it's too soon in the relationship for me to totally creep you out."