Masculinity Ponderer T-Shirts

'Macho man - you're out! We want a different image. . . We're using a 'new' man now - sensitive, gentle, debonair. . .and here he comes.'

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

Sauce for the Goose

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

"Needs to get a life"

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

I don't think I'm letting sunlight in when I open the curtains. I think the darkness is going out.

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"If you could change just one thing about yourself, what would it be?" "I’d totally wish to have my brain put into a robot body." "That way I could live forever. Imagine living long enough to buy an iPhone 7000." "Wrong answer. An alpha male never lets on that he’s concerned about his mortality. Your answer should have been 'nothing.'" "The alpha male or female is not afraid of death, little buddy." "I think I’d rather wait for the 7000–S." "Stop it."

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

'What I lack in cognitive flexibility, I make up for in moral flexibility.'

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

Afraid of change - leave it here.

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

'...and that is my philosophy.'

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."

Ivan Turgenev

'If you're omnipresent, why do I always have to climb way up here?'

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

I think my work ethic needs some work. Not to mention some ethics.

Le Penseur (D' Apres Rodin)

"I think it's wrong to hunt them when they're in a house of worship."

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

"Now, my brave little soldier, do you have everything...an apple for your teacher, your satchel, pencils and books - your existential misery??"

CCTV in church.