Marriage Escape Artist T-Shirts

"It's pro-active, Stan. I'm leaving you before you become a midlife male sleazeball creep."

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

"Ooooh, I bet that feels nice."

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

'We'd just like to get away from all leading economic indicators for a while.'

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

"This is our most difficult escape room. In here, you're a mother of 4 unruly children, tons of overdue bills and a lazy husband."

"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."

Nesting dolls stranded on an island send out nesting bottles with messages in each of them.

'This chart shows how much time we waste every day looking at charts.'

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"Always carry a ball with you! If you are chased by a dog, stop, show the ball and throw it. Believe me, he won't be able to resist chasing it instead of you..."

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

"Sorry, I'm preaching again. Why don't we pause for a moment while I pass around the collection plate."

'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'

Desert Island Fantasies

Crib Escape

Undignified Exits of the Planet World: Geronimo!

"That's you nomad's answer to everything...ROAD TRIP!"

Tweaking the CV.

"Sorry I'm late. Traffic was fine. I just don't like any of you and don't want to be here."

"It's safe to close your eyes and relax...these meetings are safety equipped with front and side airbags."

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

I'm worried about Uncle Mort. He's still in jail for refusing to reveal his secret source? Not just that. It's his relationship with Sadie. I feel like … What? She says she wants him back, but I'm not sure. Why would you say something like that? Your sweetie made you a saw with a cake in it. Oooh.

Ostrich's head buried into a pile of sand containing a woman

Chairmen of the Bored

'...Sometimes the sheer monotony of it all just gets me down.'

'These virtual-reality goggles are great! Right now, I'm sun-bathing in Tahiti...'

Office worker chips a golf ball into in tray on a desk at work.

'As usual, I'm right on time. My internal alarm clock always wakes me just as theses meetings are over.'

An office worker daydreams about a new poster.

"I'd like to point out yet again...there is no napping in meetings."

"Hide the file in one of your gluten-free cakes – so the guards won't eat it."