Marriage Advice Seekers Gifts

Bob's Marriage Advice: 'Geez, Bob. . . Now you're equating both marriage living in Florida to death?!!. . .Ah. . . so the restraining order by Disneyworld is still in effect?'

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

'The problem is, she's so damn crabby.'

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"I traded his corncob pipe and his button nose for a buttoned lip, and things couldn't be better."

What Guys Say and What They Mean,

This is forever... till death do us part...

Randy the Love Doctor. What ails you, brother? My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony. But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike? Of course. That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all. Exactly ... Wait, what do you mean by that?

"A word of advice, sir...when your wife reaches for another slice of pizza, never, ever say, 'Are you sure you should be eating that?'"

Parson and abandoned husband

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

"Well, it's the same old story, we just don't squark anymore."

'...Love, honor, cherish, and be careful what you wish for.'

Cricketer goes for marriage guidance

"He just married me on the rebound."

"What do you mean I never take you anywhere? We're here, aren't we?"

"Randy the love doctor, what ails you, brother?" "My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony." "But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike?" "Of course." "That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all." "Exactly. ...Wait, what do you mean by that?"

"You took a vow of poverty, celibacy and silence. But aren't they the marriage vows."

"You've reached Randy, the dating doctor. What ails you?"

'What do you mean, our marriage license has expired?'

"Are we sexually compatible? Well, we both get headaches at the same time..."

My Youtube channel's taking off. Mine too, little buddy. You have a Youtube channel? Of course, it's got 12.8 million subscribers. I accompanies my best-selling MANuals book series. I post a video per day. There's "Pickup Artist Mondays," "Man-Grooming Tuesdays," "Relationship Escape-Artist Wednesdays" ... "Become an Alpha in Five Minutes Thursdays" ... "New Advances in Speedos Fridays," and "Using Quantum Physics and the Multiverse Theory to Explain Why that Lady She Caught You with was Actuall

"If you've been affected by any issues raised during our love-making there's a number you can call."

Ask Sadie is back. You're on, caller. What's your problem? My wife finally answered my emails. She wants me back. She says she's sorry she left me for her personal trainer. She said making mad, passionate love to him has become unfulfilling. She said she's tired of the excitement, tired of his fancy house, tired of the lavish trips around the world, and tired of him not snoring like a jackhammer, like I always do. Let go and move on, you ninny!!! She said she's especially tired of his ability to

The Neuro — The First Official Worldwide Currency

"I never said 'I love you'. I said 'I love ya'. Big difference!"

'If you weren't afraid to commit, you'd CARVE it, not use a pencil.'

'It's almost as if you haven't heard a single word I've thought.'

"Yes, it was good for me - not as good as it was the last time, but probably better than it's going to be the time after this."

'He kept winking at one of the bridesmaids.'

'The poor thing -- her therapist recommended divorce, and she isn't even married.'

I have a date tonight. She's coming over. I need to get home and clean it all up. Not so fast, little buddy. Cleaning is a delicate art. Clean too little, and she thinks you're a slob. Clean too much, and she thinks you're hiding something. It's almost as if you haven't read chapter 7 of the manual. What manual? "Mancleaning: By Randy 'The Rock' Taylor." You wrote a whole book about cleaning? It's the follow-up to "How to Reach the Tenth Level of Passion by Feng Shui-ing Your Dust Bunnies." It's

"I'm not withholding. I'm busy."

"Just remember, the number one reason for divorce is marriage."

"We usually get along, but when we don't, we fight like, um...well, you know."