Market Underdog Supporter Gifts

"This is Thurgood. He specializes in beaten-down stocks."

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

The trauma of losing.

"Eat my dust!"

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

"Stop with this mathematics dictatorship."

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

'Some think we economic forecasters speak a lot of Mumbo Jumbo'

David and Goliath.

'Haven't they found you a chair, yet Cludmore?'

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

'Both were written this year by the same author.'

Sad businessman with sinking profits

"Thank you, Sir."

Soldier to David about Goliath: 'You did that with a step, a flick and a follow-through? Talk about high impact exercise!'

'I've never sued anyone but I bet I'll be good at it.'

"Not many of you may agree with me..."

'Oh great, we'll never win with this nerd on our team.'

"Like many attorneys I was the runt of the litter."

'You realize, don't you, that you are playing fast and loose with my self esteem?'

'Determined little guy.'

Masochistic Soccer Fan

"Hopkins has missed the sales targets for the last time!"

'I gave him the old one-two, but then he gave me three, four, five, six, seven and eight!'