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'The Dow is down? How about on the west coast?'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

Studies show foods work miracles!

"We made all the wheels out of old coffee tables and chandeliers."

On Aug. 3, 1992, the Moon rose over the horizon wearing heavy eye-liner and mohawk. Fortunately it was just a phase.

'The recession is over, again.'

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"We're making a video of us watching TV so we can watch ourselves watching TV...later."

"That shirt is so last year."

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

Jumping Wall Street.

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

"We're always excited to hear from analysts who are bullish on the market."

Final words on gravestones.

"This afternoon, we'll be turning our attention to Guess jeans."

"I suppose you're all wondering why I called this meeting today."

'Actually, they're a hybrid. They are a blue-chip, common stock.'

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

Giraffe Selfie

"D'you remember caramel before it all became 'salted?'"

An alternative theory as to why dinosaurs are extinct.

"Not until you've arranged your pillows."

"To say things are bad is an UNDERSTATEMENT...We're staring into a FINANCIAL ABYSS, the COLLAPSE of the banking sector...On the other hand some experts believe that things will be back to normal in a few months ."

In the not too distant future... "It's a tribal butterfly tramp stamp, honey. Same as yours."

"My new watch has a G.P.S. function but it always puts me in the right place at the wrong time."

The Decline of the Euro.

Investments: Remember, Time Heals All Stocks.