Market Pundit Pillows

Euro fall...

Hate Platforms

In the Guru District

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

Difference of Opinion

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

'I look forward to a bigger and bolder vision in my 2nd term.'

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

"Whoever made Keir Starmer did a sound professional job."

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

'Blast it, Peterson -- What's this I hear about you letting our profits trickle down?'

"Mom, I'm bored. Do you know something I can get hysterical and panicky about?"

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

'I'm sorry. It looks like your insurance company doesn't cover pre-existing life.'

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

'I'm afraid the cuts are beginning to bite!'

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

"As I see it, 'Crazy politics' - like not voting on a supreme court nominee - is better than a complete government shutdown."

New company policy...next time you miss a meeting I need a note from a doctor or a subpoena from a judge.

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

'It's cheaper than gas.'

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

Display of political memoirs books categorized as: 'Non-fiction,' 'Fiction,' and 'Pure Fantasy'.

"Our government is proud announce a whopping 1% GDP growth at the small cost of climate change nearly wiping our indigenous tribes out."

CONGRESS, 'No, no, you don't HAVE to fool all of the people all of the time - you just need to CONFUSE them!'