Maritime Maven Pillows

'This is my new boat. I finally succumbed to pier pressure.'

Isambard Kingdom Brunel

A Woman And A Man Discuss The Passage To America.

A pack of icebergs out hunting

"Two of everything he said, including woodworm!!"

“It’s ok to leave the lid up at home but not on a submarine.”

"Call me Ishmael."

'I didn't accuse you of being a stowaway - I merely asked to see your ticket...'

A life on the ocean wave is better than one at sea...

The Nautical Step

'A problem with the Phase II trials. Everyone - all the people - was given the placebo, and no one got the drug.'

"Yeah, I know. bu tthe administration didn't want to appear culturally insensitive."

"Like that?"

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

'I suppose you think that's funny.'

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

'She's one of our nurses hiding from the patient load.'

Look on the bright side...they'll probably name a disease after you.

'The good news is that it's not your fault.'

Podiatry. The greated podiatrist of all time, you say? Yep. I studied at his feet.

The end is near

Sadie, I just heard something disturbing, and I think you're the only one who can tell me whether it's true. Youtube is telling me we've lived 300 years of phantom time. Pope Gregory XIII's math was off when he created our calendar, and this is actually the year 1717. What's more, the "Middle Ages" is just a fiction the pope created to explain his rounding error. You were there, Sadie ... Did King Arthur really exist? I'll tell you all about that nice boy, as soon as I demonstrate how we dealt w

Pre-Old Blues

'I know my instruments are sterilized every day but I have no idea who does it.'

'I'm a practical nurse! -- I know better than to listen to doctors!'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

'Well, we're off for our xmas break - I'm sure you can manage without us for a couple of weeks.'

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

'I'm putting you on a diet: No more fat knights, maidens only...'

Vaccine hurdles

'We're trying to use a team approach to medicine, but we're having trouble fitting everyone!'

'Where does it hurt?'

ANd the Oscar for the best special side effects goes to ASTRAZENECA!

'But sinister gales - with that armour?'