Map Satire Fan Gifts

"You are still here."

1989 Map Of Sorghum Corners, Ohio

Indecision and Outrage Trays

Lot for people who don't know how to park.

'Welcome! Highly placed, unidentified administration spokespersons convention.'

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

"Ancient Aztec shaman-kings predicted a coming together of all the cultures of the world, creating a new enlightenment for human beings."

'5.40pm on the 2nd day....and still waiting for the surveyor'

"In financial news, Greek shares continue their slide. Of note, International Feta Cheese continues to crumble."

Pop star weather report.

'In future a reg number will suffice, ok.'

Do not pass.

'Police have counted the dead resulting from today's disaster. However, they suspect that some of these victims may be just playing possum.'

'They're clouds, Bob. You can't channel surf.'

Frosty decides to have a carrot job

'We need more cake shows!'

'The controversy builds, as we gather more half-arsed comments to dress up as considered public opinion!'

'Cannibalism has always repulsed me - until i tasted Aunty Judy's knees'

Reality TV

"I know more about art than you do, so I'll tell you what to like."

"I'm thinking about moving out of the suburbs."

"The big boot Italy ain't gonna kick the small shoe Sicily no more, capiche?"

Woman on a Pedestal. . . Who Married the Mothers Boy.

Messing Up My Metrics

'I really think you should check your pools, sir.'

'Uh oh. Cougar alert.'

Mariana in the Moated Grange - Commercialism in Art

"The ball of wool channel? Who the hell signed us up for that?"

'I've always been a great fan of yours. I wrote all your books!'

Statue Selfie

'I don;t see how that's going to work?'

"Goddam Dogs."

"Aside from the foot, do you think my parking's getting better?"

"It's my personal, one step recipe for success. Step 1: Gimme all your money."

"That's right. A real war with real victims and real casualties. Unfortunately The War of Withering Sarcasm wasn't one of those sexy wars the media likes to report on."