Manscaping Aficionado Pillows

Angel with angel wings for moustache meets a regular angel.

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

An ancient Egyptian exhibit at a museum.

"Commandments aren't really selling these days. However, we're willing to consider self-help tips or personal improvement ideas."

Movember

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."

Editor.

'Sorry, we can't offer you a job but we would like to publish your CV.'

"Good heavens, Caruthers. It's the wife!"

Adult Barbershop

"I found the perfect summer job! 'Greet people at retail store. Company uniform required. Must be able to carry small children.' How hard can that be?"

Early attempts at standardising currency.

"You know I hate birthdays!"

"I'm retired now - since I sold my 'know when you're naughty or nice' technology to NSA last year."

Med School Mascots.

'Another Scotch?'

Zombie plumber calling out for drains...

'Great to see the Mayan pottery collection is still drawing a crowd.'

The strong Canadian dollar is bad for the Canadian exporting manufacturers.

'U.S. Manufacturing'

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

'You may see a great creation, Dr. Frankenstein... but I only see a great heck of a Product Liability Problem.'

"It's all about teamwork. We even have our own mascot."

'How often does the boss visit the plant?'

"A drone is hovering over the plant. Find out if it's from OSHA!"

"Of course, it might help if we actually found something every once in a while!"

"I just installed a home security monitor."

'That was your grandfather -- his catapult went off while he was cleaning it.'

'Van Helsing, I've told you that just Holy Water isn't enough to kill count Snowcula! You need HOT Holy Water!'

'Full moon again Doctor.'

"Norman, let's lend out the Olmec head."

"We have sparkling and still, but I'll have to ask if we have black."

My own museum.