Managing Director T-Shirts

"You have a major fiasco at 10:30, followed by a shocking scandal at 2:15."

'I assumed when we merged that we'd have our own desk.'

Balance

'Okay, let's take a vote. All those opposed to my ideas raise their hands and say I resign.'

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

'Due to corporate cutbacks, we'll all have to sacrifice, which is why my company car will be a Mercedes, instead of the Jaguar I normally drive.'

"He's in a foul mood today."

Office Structure

'I'm going to make this short...'

'Remember Henderson; power corrupts, and absolute power is even nicer.'

'I'll be downstairs making people nervous.'

Complaining employee

'Don't tell anyone, but I got the promotion by selling my soul on e-bay.'

'We're very tight on space right now but we'll have you in an office as soon as we can. Meanwhile...'

The boss is always right.

"Of course he's smiling, he spent all the company profits before he died."

'Ms. Willard, if I said 'have a nice day' to you, I'd have to say 'have a nice day' to all my employees.'

Window Cleaner has 'Managing Director' on his jacket.

"Portrait? - what portrait ?"

Look a gift from the shareholders...some red candles and a clock! (dynamite).

Factory Floor - "I told you you were lost."

Female Boss

'But RG, you can't be a big fish in all the big ponds...you can only be a big fish in your big pond.'

Even if you're a CEO at a big corporation, you're still just a CEO at a big corporation.

Hierarchy with 'Me' at the top.

Receptionist takes managing director a cup of coffee/tea, finds him having sex with someone, leaves, then comes back with two cups of coffee/tea.

'This should be good. He just won the lottery!'

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

Boss sitting in an umpire chair to watch his employees.

Man has 'NO' built into desk.

'I feel more secure surrounded by things.'

The Man

Executive with desk-boxes 'get rich' and 'get even'.

'How did it go?' 'We had an exchange of views...I went in with my views and came out with hers!'

'I'm being promoted to The Capable Office - he said I'm incapable!'