Mammoth Memoirist T-Shirts

"See, Og If mammoth foot ticklish, could me do this"

As the world emerges from the last ice age Ug & Og discuss a historic agreement to reduce CO2 emissions from woolly mammoth barbecues.

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

'Your night writing book, madam.'

"Say, Honey, how about a nice salad for supper instead?"

'Sorry about this, but I really need a rug for my bachelor pad.'

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

Mammoth Posing

Now this is Dr. Brainstorm, he's trying to breed a moth that will eat synthetics.

'Well, shoot. Now Uncle Hector's caught in the ice! It's enough to make you want to move to Florida.'

Mammoth Tipping was the most Fatal of Primitive Teen Activities.

'Do you ever get this weird, primitive yearning to sit behind a large block of wood?'

'Here go, Thegla... It recipe you ask for.'

Republican Mutant Mammoth

Mothematics: The group of sciences that dealt with the quantities, magnitudes, geometries, algebra and calculi of moths.

'I know it looks big, but it'll shrink when I wash it.'

The wool club for mammoths.

Philip of Mastodon

"You ordered mammoth again?"

'What did you say? 'The light is nothing but an ordinary streetlamp'? Oh no! My own son is an atheist??!'

'The next time he misses the paper, we're giving him away.'

'He followed me home from the cloning lab. Can I keep him?'

Mammoth hoover

'Hey George, check it out: Somebody's been painting us on this wall...'

"I think the lines down!"

"Dear diary, I'm leaving you for a Twitter account—it's not you, it's technology..."