Mall Worker T-Shirts

'I just love the holidays. It's such a happy time of year!'

"I hear ya. These mall gigs don't pay enough."

High security Santa's grotto

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

"Sure, shopping online is faster and cheaper, but there's something almost sensuous about carrying an armload of packages!"

"Well, I have an opening in Cloverdale Mall ... let me hear you say Ho Ho Ho."

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

'You've agreed to work Sundays, haven't you!'

'We're dangerous when we shop. We're really really dangerous when we don't shop.'

Manual Worker

This Saturday 10:30 Confessions of a Window Cleaner, Doctor, Nurse, Policeman, Shop Worker, Lollipop Lady, Butcher, Baker, Housewife, Schoolboy...

A plunger in an outhouse

'Rodin's wet blanket'

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

'What the hell is PIG IRON?'

Heavy Metal Scrap Merchants.

Mall: "We always hold hands - If I let go, she shops."

'Your operation is delayed for a couple of hours... there's a big sale at the mall down the street and all the nurses are down there.'

"No the you shop noise doesn't bother me. This protects me from the incessant Christmas music."

"My religion? I'm a consumerist, first reformed midwest synod. We pray facing the Mall of America."

'Now, with this system you can do the equivalent of running a steel mill - keeping track of the quality of the ore, domestic and foreign orders, smelting processes...'

"No, let's go with the hook."

'The management of this shop take the threat of swine flu in their stride.'

"I have decided to go on holiday this year and would therefore like to hire one million santas for December 25th."

'I'm going to need backup on two. 'The situation' is escalating.'

"excuse me...what town am i in..?"

New Mall

'The president's speech on how well the recovery is going? Well, make a left at the abandoned mall, a right at the shuttered assembly plant, and a left at the closed steel mill...'

Steel fabricator