Magic Foodie T-Shirts

"Oh, this is terrible! I love it!"

'I sent out for everything.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

Ice Cream Surgeon

What the Doctor Ordered

"You do like octopus?"

Domestic Goddess.

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

"Even the waiters here are organic."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

Fast food. Even faster food

Dinner at the Trapdoors

La Table

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

"Easy for you to say - you're cured!"

Night of the Latkes

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

"Rump roast?"

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

"The space aliens who abducted me wanted to know what it was like to be loved...I wasted no time."

'He made an excellent jelly.'

"To paraprase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure with out pain au chocolat."

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'